What if I told you that these three (3) things could help you either keep your man or loose him?
What would you say?
I guess now you are curious to know what I mean so let me break it down.
But before we go into that, we have to clear up some issues first YOUR BEHAVIOUR.
Am not saying that these Behaviours are entirely your fault.
For instance when you started dating him he saw your outspoken character as exhilarating but now 2 years in and he feels you are too snappy.
You see, during and after a breakup, you are rapidly cycling through a range of emotions. You go from shock and disbelief, to anger, denial, rebellion, bargaining, sadness, acceptance, to relapse where you beg and cry “I can’t do this,” “the dark phase” where you can’t stand to hear a love song on the radio or watch a romantic movie and where you swear off men entirely, to depression.
Yep!!!
We've all being there, Done that
- You call him non-stop and plead with him to get back together
- You text him at every opportunity hoping he will respond just once
- You Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat-stalk him
- You send him a long 4-Page message begging him to come back and tell him how he made a mistake
- When desperate we attempt to make him jealous by posting pictures of yourself with random guys on your social media pages
- You try to distract yourself from the pain by drinking, smoking, partying, eating junk food
At the same time, in your depression, you stop doing the things that make your life better, like working out, eating right, spending time with friends, and meeting new people.
During this time you are so overtaken by emotion thereby resorting to emotional manipulation – crying, getting angry, begging and pleading – all things only make him run farther away.
So with that being said, what can you do to stop this? or better still prevent this from happening?
Mattew Hussey's developed these three Power moves that will help you in your relationship
ONE: HAVE AN AMAZING LIFE
Have a life that acts like a magnet to your man. That makes him want to desperately be a part of and wants you to be ridiculously happy too.
I always say, “you don’t go to a relationship to get a life, you go to a relationship to share one.”
Think about the things you want from a man: someone who is constantly expanding his horizons, growing, and exposing you to interesting new things. Well he wants those same things from you too.
When you start living an amazing life, going after your dreams and setting goals along the way not settling for anything less. It could be that business you want to start up or that promotion you want to get. Well now is the time to set your foundation, apply for that professional course...
He will notice that you are getting stronger which will make him more attracted to you. He’ll want to become a part of this awesome new life you have going. When you both have soo much to bring to the relationship, that alone makes the relationship stronger.
TWO: KILL HIM WITH KINDNESS AND LOVE
When you choose LOVE over anger, jealousy, or manipulation during difficult times, you regain your position in his mind as the perfect woman.
The interesting thing is, the more you give him the room to do as he pleases, like allowing him hangout with his buddies to drink or watching soccer matches with him even though you dislike the sport the more he’ll end up thinking you are the most incredible human being in the world and that he can’t lose you.
You are not INVESTING love, you are GIVING it freely in the moments you speak with him. Investing love implies wanting something back, so the moment you don’t get the reaction you want you will get angry or upset.
Giving love freely has nothing to do with what you get back. You are simply acknowledging that you love and care about him and though you have disagreements, your love for him rises above anything else.
One thing I just want to be clear on: Don’t confuse love and kindness with becoming his personal assistant. You are not to look after him when he’s sick and make him home made chicken soup, or pick up his dry cleaning for him. You need to maintain your standards- let him help you once in awhile, do some chores or cook you food after a long day at the office.
And please ladies, do not call him every hour on the hour. Nobody like that. Yes you might be in Love but have a little restraint.
You may think that if you’re not at his beck and call, he’ll start seeing other people. Wrong!
From a male psychology perspective, any comparison he will make when dating other women in the early stages is likely to work in your favor. These new women can’t compete with the deeper connection he has with you, and any time he spends with them he’ll be feeling “it’s not the same” and will be comparing every little action with yours.
So Not to Worry!
THREE: FOLLOW A PLAN NOT YOUR EMOTIONS
Every Lady needs to view relationships as a Chess match, you should always think one step ahead, you wouldn't want to loose your Queen now, would you?
You always want to be the one saying CHECKMATE so to do this you must follow the rules of the game.
This is the most important one of all.
This is not all about letting your emotions lead wherever they may take you, which is almost always to a bad place.
When you have a clear plan to follow, nothing can take you off that path. You always have a compass to guide you, so you don’t even have to think about what to do next. You just follow your plan and make sure that he never goes out of line and is always in Check.
Yours Truly
Joey D damsel
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